Homeowner has to explain to neighbors that their fenced garden is not a park just because it looks nice and has a tree in it:

We mistakenly assume that any place that looks like an Apple or Windows screensaver exists to look good on a screen. We feel an entitlement to claim them, to collect them. Not for enjoyment persay, but from the satisfaction that we get in "checking them off" our lists of places to visit and from the idea that we have of how other people will perceive them on our social media.

But while we feel more entitled to claim these places, for a time we, somewhat confusingly, do not feel a greater obligation to preserve them as we found them. To treat them well so that others might enjoy the same. And as we feel more emboldened as a collective to places, we think more and more that we should have them just because we want them.

It's a selfish race to the bottom.

While this might seem a little bit of a reach to connect to this story, which is about the alleged events the homeowner shared with this online community this week. 

I think that a lot of this is the driving motivation behind people, like the neighbors in this story, who think and act in this way. 

It's made worse by the fact that, instead of apologizing or simply being embarrassed, this type of entitlement drives the guilty parties to instead challenge attempts to hold them accountable as unfair.

The art of doubling down on a bad decision needs to be studied. Well, I guess it has been. One example is a study completed in 1976 which, in a business-investment simulation with 240 students, documented that negative consequences "may actually cause decision makers to increase the commitment of resources and undergo the risk of further negative consequences.”

In plain terms. We're really good at committing to an idea we staked our reputation on to save face. Equal parts self-justification and equal parts sunk cost fallacy. Cognitive dissonance born from self-preservation.

In a viral post, this homeowning couple shared how, specifically, the green-thumbed wife spent years transforming their yard into a living sanctuary. In the alleged events they shared, they returned home one day to find 4 complete strangers lounging under their pergola while their baby lay in a literal bed of flowers, which were now considerably flatter than before.

The group had even moved the husband's motorcycle so they could bring their strollers onto the property. You know, around the fence and up the driveway to get to their destination. When confronted, they insisted that the garden was a public park

Instead of simply admitting that they were caught red-handed on private property, they resorted to face-saving by recasting the homeowner as selfish rather than admitting their own mistake in judgment or character.

So, "this looks like it could be public" quickly became "This should be public." As they committed to mental hurdles in order to justify their reason for being there.

There's a tree, so this must be a park!!
 

My wife has invested *incredible* amounts of time and effort into our yard in the last few years. Unusually, our house sits way to one side of our lot, so the one side is just 6000 square feet of flower beds, a 15x25 fenced garden, a MASSIVE flowering imperial cherry tree, wrought-iron arches with climbing trumpet vines, hummingbird misters, bird baths, the whole bit.

Story / Billiam201

Mind you, it is fenced in. And you have to walk around 3 parked vehicles and go through 2 gates to get in there.

I come home from work, and the first thing I notice is a baby sitting in the flower bed, throwing dirt everywhere. For a moment, I think it's someone my wife has over, until I notice that neither of the cars in the driveway belongs to us. I park at the end of the driveway, and 4 people are sitting under my pergola, at my table, with their strollers.

For some reason, I hadn't noticed until they had to move my motorcycle to get their strollers up to and through the gate.

I walk up and ask them who the heck they are, what they're doing in my yard, and who owns the baby currently destroying my wife's flowers.

I get an extraordinarily snotty response that they live on this block now, and are as entitled to use the park as anyone else. I told them it's not a park, it is my yard, and they need to leave.

Rather than admitting they made a mistake, she decides to get huffy, and tell me that it doesn't become mine just because I live next to it. I told her she had until I finished using the bathroom, because if I came back out and they were still there, I would call the police.

They left, and I put a padlock on the gate.

The husband showed up 3 hours later wanting to know what the park hours were. I told him there weren't any park hours, it is my yard. He told me it wasn't fair that I had a private park, and I'd be hearing from his lawyer.

I'm sure it's going to get interesting in the next few months.

ETA: This has been up for 20 minutes, and it's already been pointed out so much I'm adding that I already have cameras. Both the security kind and the bird kind.